This past year has been intense. The level of stress, anxiety and depression I have struggled with has been unparalleled. Completing my Masters was a big part of the stress, but there was immense satisfaction that came along with it. Work has been excruciating, two major audits from government departments and significant hold ups of funding. All of this has physical, mental, and emotional effects on my health. Last couple of days has been tiring, can feel my body fighting off something. I find this frustrating, cause I have so much to do at work. The more pressure I feel, the more my body wants to withdraw. This is where my dogs come in.
My dogs provide me with the comic relief, motivation to get out and about, and companionship. Today they waited while I slept until 3pm. I was finally able to get enough energy to take them out. I knew I wasn't going to be able to walk them, but at least if I took them out to where we hike, they could run around, dig, and chase chipmunks. Then I took them to the lake for a swim. This energized me, the cool breeze, sun, and water. I was so happy to see that all the puppies love to swim and fetch. This is one of my favourite things, is to go to the lake and swim and suntan. So knowing I have dogs who love to do similar activities, makes me happy.
I love to socialize and interact with coworkers, clients, friends and family etc. I focus all my attention, empathy, listening, etc when I am with them. But I also feel like I am intruding on people when I spend time with people. Like they could be doing something better with their time. This is the root of my imposter complex. While my imposter complex has lessened in recent years, I still struggle with it continuously. I would welcome any new perspectives about people`s imposter complexes, if you are willing to share.
1 comment:
I know how you feel. Myy job has also beeen very stressful recently, and. I struggle with anxiety, depression, and as I learned just today-imposter complex. I always wonder if life feels this hard for evveryone...I'm. Sure it does. I live well- I try to remember that...but my dog is what reminds me of it every day! She is so happy to just lay around with me aand licks my face when I'm sad. I sometimes wonder what she is thinking about. I like to bbelieve that she is always in the present...never worrying about the past or stressing about tomorrow. Its almost like meditation to just be in thee moment. It helps. Thanks for the post.
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